- Paula: We'd like to get to the point where Connor is everywhere, like oxygen or gravity or clinical depression.
- Paula: Conner's music may not be what I listen to in my free time, but it seems to make so many people money.
- Conner: Harry, what the hell?
- Harry: First of all, this is an 18,000-seat arena. Nobody sells this out. You sold 15,000 seats. That's still really good.
- Conner: No, it's not good. Hammerleg sold this place out last week.
- Harry: Well, Aquaspin agrees with you. They're concerned about ticket sales.
- Conner: What? But it's an 18,000 seat place. Nobody sells that out.
- Harry: Hammerleg did last week.
- Nas: I didn't really relate to that song because, you know, I had different things in my Jeep than he had in his Jeep.
- Mariah Carey: "I'm So Humble", I instantly connected with that because I'm probably the most humble person that I know.
- Ringo Starr: He's writing a song for gay marriage, you know, like it's not allowed. It's allowed now.
- Deborah: We can upload your entire album to fridges, washer dryers, blenders, and microwaves across the country.
- Owen: You could do that?
- Deborah: Yes, nerd. It's just wifi jibber jabber; it's not a big deal.
- Eddie: Nobody doin' appliance shit, my nigga.
- Deborah: Isn't that right, my nigger? No one is doing appliance shit!
- Harry: Okay... w-with the hard "r".
- Conner: There's no such thing as selling out anymore, man. This is how big business works. I mean, nowadays, if you don't sell out, people will wonder if nobody asked you to.
- Khaled 'DJ Khaled' Khaled: All I wanna know is who was in that fish costume? That was amazing!
- Tyrus Quash: The fish was me! Tyrus! Shh.
- Hunter: Oh! Conner4Real in the flesh? Hey, yo! It's... It's an honor to meet you, man. CONNquest, Style Boyz, I grew up off that shit, man.
- Owen: Thanks.
- Hunter: I wanna be you, kind of, but not white. Like black still, 'cause it's strong. It's a strong color.
- Conner: For sure, yeah.
- Hunter: Like, you are that dude. Like, have you met you? Have you met you? You? Have you met you?
- Conner: Yeah, yeah.
- Hunter: You know what I'm saying? This is crazy.
- Harry: You be you.
- Hunter: You don't want me to be all that 'cause I'll tear some shit up. You know how it is?
- Conner: That is great...
- Hunter: Hell, yeah! We gonna turn up a show up here! You know how it is!
- Conner: Okay.
- Hunter: But seriously, man. I'm real honored, dawg. I'm not gonna let you down. You my idol, right next to Jesus and Morgan Freeman.
- Conner: My fans and me... we're in love. My songs are love letters and the arena is our bedroom. The stage... the stage is where we fuck.
- Claudia Cantrell: [lyric from the song "Turn up the Beef" by Claudia Cantrell] Turn up the Beef
- Claudia Cantrell: Throw your Body on the Flame