Mr. Garrison gets an operation and becomes a woman; Kyle gets surgery to become tall and black so he can play basketball; Gerald decides he wants to be a dolphin.
The boys enlist Kyle's cousin to help them lose in baseball so they won't have to go to the finals. Meanwhile, Randy trains to fight other parents during Stan's games.
When a dam breaks and floods a nearby town, South Park residents assume it was caused by global warming and barricade themselves in the community center.
Butters fakes his own death and disguises himself as a girl so he can infiltrate a sleepover and steal a fortune telling device from the girls. Meanwhile, Butters' father turns to the occult to bring back his son.
Ms Garrison realises she still has feelings for Mr Slave. But Mr Slave has moved on and plans to marry his new boyfriend, Big Gay Al as soon as the Governor signs the same sex marriage bill.
Several religious leaders recongize Stan as the second coming of L. Ron Hubbard, and a whole soap opera unfolds with the help from a famous R&B sensation.
Randy is forced to go to AA meetings, where he becomes convinced that he has a disease. Desperate, he and Stan go on a pilgrimage to a statue of the virgin Mary that is miraculously bleeding from its ass.